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Trying to Escape

During World War II, a British pilot was shot down while
on a bombing mission over Germany. He sustained
terrible injuries when he crash landed, but he was pulled
unconscious from his plane and taken to a German
military hospital to recover.

When he regained consciousness a few days later, a
kindly German doctor was at his bedside. "Major Howe,"
said the doctor, "The injuries that you received when
your plane crashed are most severe. Both of your legs
and both of your arms have extensive damage. In fact,
your right leg has been crushed so badly, we have to
amputate it immediately. I realize how terrible this must
make you feel. I am a doctor first, and a German
second. If I can do anything to comfort you, please don't
hesitate to ask."

"Well Doctor," replied Major Howe, "There is something
that you can do for me. Can you give my amputated leg
to the Luftwaffe and ask them to drop it over England
during their next bombing mission. I sure would feel
better if my leg wound up in good old England."

"I see no problem with that," said the doctor. "Consider it
done."

So after the operation, the doctor gave the amputated leg
to a German officer with instructions to drop it over
England.

Unfortunately, two days later the doctor had to give
Major Howe some more bad news. "Major Howe," said
the doctor. "I'm afraid that gangrene has set in on your
left leg, and it too must be amputated. Any requests?"

"Yes," he replied. "Could you drop that leg over England
also?"

"Ya," said the doctor, and after the operation, he gave
the Brit's leg to the same German officer and asked him
to dispose of it as before.

One week later, the doctor had still more bad news for
the Major.

"Major Howe," said the doctor, "We have done
everything in our power to save your two arms, but I'm
afraid that gangrene has set in on both of them and we
must amputate immediately. Can I assume that ..."

"Yes," interrupted the Major, "If you would be so kind,
old boy, please see that both of my arms are dropped
over good old England."

The doctor promised to take care of his request and he
again asked the same German officer to drop the
amputated limbs over England. This time, however, the
officer became perturbed and insisted on speaking with
the British pilot.

"So," said the German officer, "You are the pilot who
wanted his right leg dropped over England?"

"Yes," replied Major Howe. "That is jolly well correct."

"Hmmmm. And then you wanted your left leg dropped
over England?"

"Yes," replied the Major. "That is correct as well."

"And now you say you want both of your arms dropped
over England?"

"Correct again," replied the Major.

"Hmmmm, very interesting," mused the suspicious
German officer. "Tell me something, Major ... you're not
trying to escape, are you?"

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